Lovebug is Growing Up - Waaaahhhh!

From the beginning, I have enjoyed waking to little feet laid over me in my bed. I have treasured night time when I would get in bed with my daughter and I'd lay there humming to her until she fell asleep. My hubby and I figured there will be a day when the kids wouldn't crawl in our bed anymore or want us to put them to sleep. 

My hubby puts my son to sleep every night and I do the same with my baby girl.  My Lovebug.  My son, my Little Love, crawls into our bed every morning between 3am and 4am.  My daughter did that for years, as well.  She would crawl in our bed and sleep with her little butt butt on my back.  When she turned around eight-years-old, she started staying in her bed all night unless she was sick.  I've continued to put her to sleep every night.  So cool, you know?  She still needs me:) 

Then last night...

Last night right before we turned out the lights and got all positioned in her bed she said she wanted to start going to sleep on her own starting tonight.  My heart broke a little but I didn't let it show.  I smiled and said, "Of course, baby."  Then I hummed all the songs and she fell right to sleep.

I quietly got up from her bed and walked over to my bedroom.  My hubby was already in bed, so I next to him and cried a little.  I whined that Lovebug had asked to start going to sleep on her own as of tonight.  He smiled and did a little chuckle and said, "It's happening.  She's growing up, babe."

Well, I'm not ready for her to grow up!  
Not. At. All.  
I am putting my foot down.  My baby girl isn't a baby anymore.  Listen, she turned ten last October and I was okay with that.  I was prepared for that to happen.  Duh! Every birthday we get older. 

What wasn't I prepared for???

I wasn't ready to teach my daughter how to shave her little TEN!  
I wasn't ready to explain why she was already getting cramps and little mood swings, even though she doesn't have her period yet.  
I wasn't ready for her to grow up yet.  

So last night, I wasn't just tearing up because she wanted to go to sleep alone....It's just too soon, alright?!


Oh, loveys, my baby is growing up.  It's bittersweet.  I hope she reads this one day and sees how her mama almost had a conniption fit but she never knew.  I hope that she sees how effortlessly I made it all look although I was freaking the eff out.

Hold me.

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Because, I love you, my Lovebug. More than life itself. 
I hope you know until the end of time how much I love you. I'm freaking out for sure, but it's okay. You can read this one day and when you're freaking out with your daughter, you'll say, "Oh good. Mama felt the same way."
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