Your Problem...or Mine
I get it...
I see your picture perfect life.
I see all the weight you lost.
I see the beautiful little walks you take with your kids.
I notice every single outfit you wear.
I notice that your makeup and hair always looks "just right".
I understand that this is what you show to the world.
I understand that you want me to believe that you don't care about the numbers.
I get that what you show on all those social media posts is just a part of your real life.
But why can't I get past that?
Why do I feel lonely when I see you out on the town for a girls' night (day, whatever)?
Why do I feel like less because you look like you are never sad or alone or feel less like I do?
I get that it's all for show.
It has to be.
You can't have that perfect of a life.
You've got to have struggles like the rest of us.
You must feel overwhelmed sometimes right?
How is it that you're always surrounded by family or friends?
How can you afford to go to all these places?
How can you always have a babysitter?
How are you able to have date nights?
Don't you ever struggle with money?
Do you ever get disappointed?
These are the thoughts in my head when I scroll through social media. Why? How? Sometimes I get depressed looking at my feed on Instagram. I see all the comments. The hundreds of likes. All those things you are doing that I'm not.
Sometimes I don't want to look at another photo or read another Facebook post you write because I just can't.
But, I get it.
It's not your fault I feel this way.
That's my shit I have to take care of.
But sometimes, just sometimes, I'd love to see the real you. That one photo where you look a mess because you don't actually wake up like that.
Oh shit do you?
That just can't be fair.
But I understand. I get it. I do the same shit. All the damn time. Because God forbid someone might see that my life isn't perfect.
That I have complete and utter breakdowns.
That I get frustrated and overwhelmed with life sometimes.
Or what would people say if they knew how much I wish I had friends. Friends I could call up and say, "let's hang out tonight and #overgram the night away!"
But that's not my life.
Or my truth.
So I'll just keep showing what I do.
And you do the same.
We all have to play the game.
You know... The one where we all pretend we don't have insecurities and meltdowns.
Let's keep playing that game.
Or maybe, just maybe...we can stop pretending and be real.
Will I ever really post this? Maybe not. Or maybe I will. Hey, maybe someone out there feels the same damn way I do.
I get it. I really do. I just don't always have to like it.
See you in your picture perfect world.
I'll be following for sure.